Slow Going If You Aren't Blonde

So, I am NOT blonde, or asian, or ethnically special in any way.  Doesn't mean I'm not hot or funny or smart.

I'm also not thin as a twig, sharped like Barbie (before she got her make over), ripped like a body builder, or air brushed.  Doesn't mean I'm not sexy, cute, and fashionable.

I do not have perfect skin, hair, or nails.  Doesn't mean my hair isn't long, my nails aren't pretty, and my skin doesn't enjoy the best facials and products money can buy.

My point is this:  In order to get a Sugar Daddy you don't have to look like a plasticized and airbrushed version of who you are. 

I get plenty of responses on my profile but I have certain expectations (just as in normal dating) that I wish to be met before agreeing to meet in person, and even AFTER we meet in person I have expectations.

I could have had a few SD's by now if I was okay with creeps, false promises, and crawling into bed right away. 

I am not saying it isn't difficult to find a pot SD that you think you might have something in common with, and even then if you do have chemistry he could choose a DIFFERENT sugar baby over you.  This happened to me too.

I understand getting down about not finding the 'right' Sugar Daddy right away (or mommy, even), but don't give up y'all, cause there's someone for EVERYONE out there.

And... if you need a travel buddy to feel safe and meet a pot, I'll be your buddy if you'll be mine.  ^.^

Sugar... NOT SPLENDA!

So, I have had an uproarously busy last couple of days, I met TWO pot SD's in one day.  The one from out of state (who was so sexy... I had to take a moment there), and then another local guy who was a bit younger (34).

I told you all about the trip out of state, so I will tell you about this second guy.

I got home, looked around my apartment, and sat on my bed to check to see if I had an e-mails from pot SD's and then started e-mailing my tail off.  During that time a local SD (this guy lives 20 min away from me) sent me his phone number and asked me to call him.  I saw no reason not to, other than the fact that is was MIDNIGHT!

We talked for awhile, and after about twenty minutes he asked me to meet him.

At.  His. House.

So, being a dare devil, a kind of nut (thought not a wall nut, cause their boring, ha!), and not thinking as clearly as I ought to have been due to lack of sleep: I got in my car (with my dogs) and drove over to meet him.  He lives in the BEST part of town, in a freaking mansion!! 7 bedrooms, sauna, 6 bath, massive kitchen with marble countertops, three stories... seriously... woah.  I work in real estate and if I didn't I might have wet myself. 

I digress... anyways!  I go inside, and he is fairly good looking (I'm in sweats and a v-neck t-shirt = my jammies).  We start discussing SB/SD relationships.  And he flat out tells me that he thinks that talking about money up front in a regards to a relationship is a turn off.  SPANKING NEW SD. DING! DING! DING! 

I laugh it off and we have a friendly debate where he thinks, "The giving should develope naturally."  My comment being this:  In a sugar realtionship, everything is up front and agreed to so as not to cause the complications, emotional or otherwise.

We talked for awhile more, and then he said there was no way he could commit to something without sleeping with a girl first, because what if it wasn't good.... basically he wanted to get laid, and I wasn't havin it.  I called his marble counters ugly, laughed, said good night and left after he told me I ought to seek out an older 'more expereinced' SD... YA THINK!?!?!?

This Sugar isn't free, and unless your dick is made of fucking holy wishes and gold.... nope, not even then.

Stupid new Splenda Daddies.  I'm not giving you the milk before you buy the cow!!

Oh... I wore my knife (very intimidating black heavy thing) on my sweats and put it on the counter next to me where he could see it too.  Also texted my friends his address.

No Splenda here.... just sleep deprivation.

Possibly Sugar... Possibly Not :/

Hey ya all!  So, as you know, I flew to meet a pot SD for the first time in his hometown.  I took the following precautions before I left:

1.I called the airline to confirm my ticket.  This is not hard to do but it takes about twenty minutes of your time, but worth it to make sure the ticket is round trip.

2. I called the hotel to confirm my reservation and to also check for the envelope that was to contain my cab and hotel fare.

3. I took a cab to the hotel, and had them change my name so he wouldn't know which room out of the 1000 or so they had there, I was in.

4. I made sure I had at least three different friends agree to call me during the meeting.  Each one set to call me twice at different times.

5. During the meeting, after breakfast and before the airport, I took down his license plate number (with out his knowledge) and sent it to said friends.  ^.^

6. I kept my phone charger and cold hard cash on hand in case of an emergency.

7. I didn't take my best shoes or clothes, just in case things went south... men are easy, but a nice pair of heels is hard to find.  ^.^



Now, on to the good stuff!

We met for breakfast and talked for a little while, it was just like any other date with the exception of the question, "Are you new to the Sugar world?" (cstm - chuckling softly to myself).  He was a perfect gentlemen, paid for everything (plane tickets, hotel, cab, etc), kept his hands to himself and... HE WAD GOREGOUS!  He has a great personality, he made me laugh, the conversation was great, we had an interesting second half of the date... no whoopee or anything, but we talked about how things would work and how to safe (sexually) until we trusted one another, etc.

At the end of the date, prior to the airport, he told me he had another meeting with a pot SB on Friday, and that he would call me after.  Once he, 'decided' if I was the right SB for him.

I can't stop thinking about this sexy older man!!  It drove me nuts most of the way home! lol  I do hope he ends up becoming my SD, I wanted to kiss him at the end of the date but I didn't want to be too forward.... so I hugged him instead. ;-P

If he chooses another SB, then I had a good trip and got a little spending money out of the deal.

Sugar, Sugar, Don't Tease....

HEY ALL!!  So, I am off (in a few hours) to go meet a pot SD!  Pretty exciting!!!!  Ticket is at the airport, with my name, round trip, and the hotel is booked.  I don't have a friend to travel with me (unfortunately), but I have plans to be safe.

1. LOTS of Phone Calls from those in my life that know I'm living this life style.
2. Envelope for hotel room, so I can choose any hotel I want.
3. Fake Name given to Front Desk to book the room.
4. Taxi (or Car service) to pick me up and drop me off.

That's about all I can do, including pepper spray and other various things to be as safe as possible with out hijacking my friends lives. ^.^

 Well.  I am off to finish getting ready and take a nap.  I shouldn't have drank with my boss last night.  Huuuuuuung Ovvvveeeerrrrrr.  -  That's another thing Sparklers... if you know you have a meeting with a pot SD, you should stay sober.  Seriously. 

Flying, Meetings, and Nerves

Hey Sugars!!!

  I am supposed to meet a pot SD tomorrow (or today I suppose, since it is 3am my time).  HE is buying the ticket, paying for the room, the car service, and other things as well.  I told him I wanted to bring a friend to ensure my safety and he agreed.  I have a problem with this arrangement... DAMNIT!

I don't have any female friends and the ones I do have live in different states.  I want to keep the sugar lifestyle to myself until I have more of a grip on what I am doing, so I can't be too open about what it is I am doing.  I asked everybody I knew, and all of them have classes or work that they can't miss to come with me.  Unfortunately.  So, I need one of my Sugar Readers to call and make sure I am ok and such, if you would, plus I am having friends here call and check up on me.

 One of the nice things about being cautious is that it makes sure the pot SD knows that I am just as invested as he is in the discretion and seriousness of the arrangement.  Or. I think so.

I think I need more female friends, and I would like to befriend some female sugars and take trips to see them and vice versa.  My boss (who is male) knows that I live this lifestyle (or am starting to, as it were) and he is ok with it, so having a female friend come out to my apartment and talk shop and bond would be oh so nice. ^.^  I do miss girl time, and it seems that I don't have a whole lot of women close to me to spend my time with.  If anybody else out there in sugarland is in this situation I would love to hear from you.  My e-mail is whopond@gmail.com  (yes I am aware that I could get flooded with spam).

  I just want somebody to spend my money with and bond with on a female level.  No matter how kind the sugar daddy, girls can be girls.

  I am nervous about the trip, but I haven't got the itinerary yet, so we will see what happens.  I am trying to figure out what to wear... Jeans? A skirt? Nice slacks? Heels... FOR SURE.  What!?!?

  Wish me luck Sparklers and Veterans alike.  Love you!

Let's Talk About The Most Important Asset you have: YOU!

I wanted to post this while I was thining about it, before I forgot, and before I went to bed because it is THAT important and it isn't some fluffy BS either.  This is straight talk, from me to you, no little fluffy corners either Sugars, sharp edges (and tonge all the way).

Ok, so I haunt the blog (and post there too) on SA, and I surf and look at other SB's profiles.  Ya all are a bunch of negative whiney bitches!

  Remember what I said about farting rainbows and coughing butterflies?  Hop on that train about yourself because if you don't, why would a REAL pot SD want to meet with you if you don't even like you?

You are on SA because you have something to offer these top tier men that no other person in the entire freaking world has: YOU.  If you don't think you're a hot commodity the way you are, then honey, you need to pull your profile and go somewhere else. 

I don't care if your short and fat, tall and flat as board, skinny as wire hanger, or curvier than Marilyn Monroe.  YOU ARE YOU, and somebody on that site will send you an e-mail, more than one somebody, if you post a positive profile.

  THink about all your skills (other than shopping): Can you cook? Can you clean? DO you make up corny jokes? Do you like sex in the shower? Are you good at sex in the shower? Do you knit? Sew? Crochet? Underwater basket weave? 

My point is this, no matter what it is you can do, it is a priceless skill and potential weapon in your arsenal of awesome!! 

  I have tattoos and some tiny scars and I laug so loud during movies it causes other people to laugh too (at me, not with me folks), but I know one man who found that last particularly charming, he wasn't in the Sugar lifestyle, but the point is that there is seriously SOMEBODY who finds you amazing, but you absoultely have to find yourself amazing first. 

Got it?  Good.  No go wipe that bullshit negativity off your profile and start farting rainbows.

To Blog or Not To Blog

Hello Sparklers, VSB, SB, SM and SD's alike!  I hope you are all finding your Saturday well. 

Me?  I'm exhausted.  I just got off work, very tired, but I acheived a lot today!

Came home to an apartment that has become a type of metaphor for my life.  My room-mate moved out and took all his furniture, which was, well, everything.  So, now my place is pretty empty, and I have some more work to do in order to clean it up and move out as well.  Please don't take this as me complaining, because I'm not.  Things could be a lot worse (I've been in worse), and I know that once I get my first paycheck (from my new job) that things will start to look a lot better.

Now that the (seemingly) sad is out of the way, onto the good!!!  I got three (!) responses today, one was some advice that I had asked for on my profile, one was a comment on a possible visit from a pot SD (hoorah) and another was one from an e-mail I sent out last night to pot SD in my area that made me a little too giddy to sleep (last night, at 4am).  I'm going to tell you about the last.

 I read this pot SD's profile and followed all the steps I recommended to you pot SB's out there, and based on the SUBJECT LINE he was excited to respond to me.  It was about one of his interests, (one we have in common) hiking and he seemed genuinely enthused to hear from me.

 Just sayin, it makes a Sparkler SB feel like she has a better chance than 12%.  Ya know??

^.^  Keep your heads up Sparklers and wish me luck.  I WISH YOU ALL LUCK! ^.^

And, what do you think of my updated blog format and photos???

Another tip for Sparklers (That's you New Sugar Babies)!

So, I have gotten 7 emails in the past seven days.  1 (one) email for every day I have been on SeekingArrangement.com  


That, ladies, is A LOT!


  Let me give you this massively helpful tip:  If you are serious, and I mean really serious about finding yourself that perfect SD, you need to spend at least one hour (yes, 60 full minutes) reading, writing, and reviewing (I'll go over this step by step).

 60 minutes EVERY DAY doing the following

Reading: You go through and read every SD's profile you can find that interests you (this doesn't take sixty minutes, most profiles can be read in 10 minutes, and this is reading them twice).

Writing: Once you find a pot SD you like, you DO NOT WINK at them, you click that big fat e-mail button and you come up with something witty as the subject, something that shows your personality, and you write them a 5-10 line email and end it in a positive note (this can take up to 10-15 minutes, it's harder than it sounds).  Something like, "I hope I made you smile." or "Have a sunshiney day!"  Honey, you wanna sound like you fart rainbows and cough butterflies.  These men's lives are stressful and they don't want that negativity in their lives, they get enough at work. DO NOT HIT SEND YET

Reviewing: After you write that sunshiney e-mail, you minimize your window and go back and read his profile, yes a third time.  You are a new SB (Sparkler), and once is NEVER enough.  Then, you review your e-mail and if it sounds good, and I mean you giggle if you wrote a joke or smile, then it's a gem. 

Then, AND ONLY THEN, hit send and watch it flutter off into cyberland.

Let me give you some odds here ladies: Seven days, seven e-mails. I have sent 39 messages, and recieved 7. 

  39-7, that means (for those, like me, that suck at math) a  17% response rate. 

  Yeah, 17 percent.  Not high, at least not really.  And I can tell you that two of those men really wanted an escort, so that lowers the odds to a 12% response rate.  And I met one, so far, and he was a creeper.

  Think about that next time you open your accounts up girls. 

Nothing happens by itself.  You gotta work your Sparkle ladies, cause the sugar doesn't just show up.

Oh... I'm not a blonde supermodel either. 

NO EXCUSES.



Full Time Job While Seeking SD

  I am sure that the entire point of being a SB is to NOT work for some, though this is a nice thought and great for those women, I HAVE to work.  Everybody knows, that no matter how great the relationship, the Sugar ends eventually, and there can be lulls between SD's, which means you (as a SB) are stuck paying your own bills and making ends meet.

  I like contingency plans, so I went out and got myself a job.  I work 40 hours a week (this includes normal weekends), but have Mondays and Tuesdays off, so I would say this limit's my search for conventional Sugar.  I would think the less conventional Sugar Daddies, those looking for something more discreet even (which I am NOT opposed to) would prefer an SB like me, they could write off days they spend with me, as work to their significant others, less suspicion I would think.

 I lost one SD (the previously mentioned NY Daddy) because I got have this job.

I do need to mention at this point that when I set out on my search for an SD that I did not have a job, but I sure as hell wasn't going to turn one down that paid above minimum wage with some small bonuses, especially when my phone was about to get turned off, my car repo'd, and end up on the street.

My point is this: No matter how difficult the search for any one of you SB's pot SD's, keep your chin up and stay positive.  Having a job may force you to re-write your profile, or you can add into your profile that for the "Right Daddy" you will give up your job for that hefty allowance and travel at a moments notice.

But... I do caution you to make sure that pot SD is the real deal, and not quit your job ahead of time just because he promised you diamonds and the home of your dreams, or you might find yourself on the street with too many bridges burned to salvage your situation.

 ;-P  Love you Sugar Community!

Tips For First Dates w/ UNKNOWN SD's

So, I have a few tips for all you Sparkling New Babies like me, things I couldn't find easily online and things I think we should ALL know, most are about protecting the most important asset you bring to the table, YOU:

First of all, Get yourself a google voice account and forward it to your cell phone for maximum privacy, that way if your pot SD turns out to be a creep you can close it and no more problem.  These accounts are capable of texting.

Same goes for an email account, 1 (one) account JUST for sugar daddies that don't want to use the web site (for whatever reason) they found you on.

And, before you leave for you Sugar meeting, tell a friend where you're going and to call you after x amount of time, and if you don't get back to them right away, have them tell somebody.

If you aren't comfortable in the situation, leave it.  These are dates.  If a first date ever did what the SD in my previous post did to me, it would be over so fast his hair would be on fire.  Still, something to be said about being gracious.

So... I look forward to comments and suggestions, and if there's a VSB that would take me under her wing and help me out, I'd be more than happy for the help and suggestions.

First adventure of a Sparkling NEW Sugar Baby

So, ladies and gents, I have decided to become one of the world's smartest women and become a Sugar Baby (SB).

I bought a book that was a companion for a much advertised Sugar website (SeekingArrangement.com).  I read the book, not all the way through yet, but most of it, and did what most of you "veteran" SB's (VSB) have done: Wrote my profile, uploaded my photos, rewrote my profile, decided what I could bring to the table and how much I wanted per month (via allowances, gifts, trips, etc.), and rewrote my profile, and then added this profile to SugarSugar.com as well.  I figured I would cast a wider net and find a few more fish.

I also read up on a lot of the advice from you VSB's and Sugar Daddies (SD), and followed as much of it as possible.  I didn't want to go into this naive and un-cautious.  I did as much research as possible and was entirely honest with myself about what I wanted, who I am, and I what I have to offer.

After doing all that, sending out quite a few e-mails myself, and getting three back (granted it has only been three days, so I think I'm doing damn well if I say so myself), I went through the process of vetting the SD's that contacted me.

The first one turned out be a complete perv... eww.

The Second may still have potential but I also might have scared him off with my straight forward e-mail.  He brought up sex, so I brought up money (this is all in the SA book and on the blogs as being an ok thing to do, but we will see).

The third I met after exchanging a few e-mails and phone numbers (I used my google voice account to keep myself protected).

It seemed, to me, that he was a complete gentleman (on the phone), he congratulated me on getting hired at my new position, met me at a local restaurant in my area, and paid for everything.

 The conversation flowed nicely, I limited myself to one drink to get to know him better and not appear to be an alcoholic (which I'm not), laughed and had a good time.

 He put his hand on my thigh, and I laid mine on top of his to stop it from wandering and because, honestly, his man is a very attractive looking man.

Then... the conversation turned to sex.   So, I suggested taking a walk outside in the outdoor mall area.

Once outside we discussed what each of us was looking for, and I didn't expect (or want to) talk about money on the first date or meeting.  He asked me what I wanted, and I told him I wanted my bills paid for, an allowance, and special gifts and trips (pretty standard, right ladies?), he agreed and we kept walking.

Finally, (I say finally because my sexy red kitten heels were killin' my feet) we found a seat outside and at this point he got quite handsy (strike number one in my book), he tried to push my skirt up my knee, I stopped him gently but firmly, and he smiled and leaned in to kiss me.  Not a bad kisser, not pushy, but not mind blowing; decent. We continued talking after the first kiss (which he told me was mind blowing), and I saw him grab his manhood... can we saw, ew (strike number two)?  There were small children and families walking by the whole time.

We got up and walked some more, and he kept talking about wanting to see me naked and make out in alleyways and such, flattering but... not my style.

We said good evening, agreed to a second meeting on Tuesday afternoon (my day off), and I went home to relax and get ready for work.

The relaxing part wasn't happening yet:

He called me and was pushing to come to over and make out and promised to leave after so I could get some sleep and so on and so forth, I was gentle but firm using every excuse in the book from, "I don't ever invite first dates, whether their sugar or romantic, over or into my home.", to,"If it's exciting now, then the anticipation and excitement will build and be all the better on Tuesday."

After about five or so minutes of this I said to him, "I understand you want to see me tonight, but if you don't want to take things a bit slower and get to know one another better, than I think I'm not the right girl for you." He told me, "I am trying to use power to get my way and I can see that isn't working. I don't want to scare you away."   and we said good evening.

Needless to say, I don't think he's the perfect daddy for me.
_________________________________________________________________________________

My own comments on this date: REALLY!?!? You think it's ok to try and push a woman you barely knows skirt up in a public place where children are walking by??  Hah! No.

Grabbing your crotch, in public, is NEVER acceptable.  Ever.  If you have to re-adjust, be really freakin discreet about it. Jeesh.

Pushing that hard to come into MY private space when we barely know one another is a serious 'HELL NO!' In my book.

Pushing AFTER I've said no makes me want to poke you in the eye, I don't care how wealthy or powerful you are.